OK, the review of Transformers the (Live-Action) Movie. Not to be confused with the original 1986 Transformers the (Animated) Movie. This is copied off my original review on Multiply... Be warned that this is my personal view on what I felt about the movie, it contains spoilers, and is indicated by "SPOILERS AHEAD". So if you haven't watch the movie, bookmark this page, WATCH it, then come back...
I'll start by giving a brief background of the storyline, franchise and the movie...
The Transformers Story
Transformers are advanced sentient robotic life-forms from the Planet Cybertron. Created by the Quintessons, these advanced aliens have the unique ability to "transform" (pun intended by all means) to various vehicles and objects of varying nature (on how they learned to transform, there has many different theories in different formats). Eventually there was a civil war. An epic war that raged on for millions of years and nearly destroyed the planet. Peace-loving Autobots (Autonomous Robotic Life-forms) waged their battle to destroy the evil forces of the Decepticons (military-based separatist group obsessed with possession of power and bent on causing destruction). The Autobots were led by Optimus Prime, a true hero by all means, a charismatic leader who stood for all things right and would fight to the death for the ones he love. The Decepticons however, were led by Megatron, a sinister mastermind of all things evil, another charismatic leader whom was idolized by a few and feared by many. The war went on for centuries until it reached a point that Cybertron has depleted all sources of energy. Autobots then went out to space in search of other forms of resources, and Decepticons followed, not wanting to be left out. An encounter and battle in space distracted them from the fact that their ships were too close to a planet called Earth (yeah, our planet!) and they got sucked in by its gravity, crashed into a volcano and entered stasis lock for 4 million years. When the volcano eventually erupted, their on-board computer Teletraan-1 reactivated them and rebuilt their bodies using data from vehicles and objects on Earth (presuming these vehicles & objects to be the dominant life-form, because to them only robotic beings are considered "alive"). So they now are able to transform to Earth vehicles or objects and therefore the war continues on our planet. This isn't an elaborate/full description of events because I'm not going to go into further detail which will take forever. Go watch G1!
News on the Live-Action Movie
Anticipation for the live-action version of this insanely popular classic hit cartoon/toyline/comics has been building up for more than a year before this movie was launched. Purist fans of the original 1984 series, dubbed "Generation One" or "G1" have defended the roots of the story for as long as I remember. So it was no surprise that from the moment the first designs leaked onto the net, it brought much disappointment and anger throughout cyberspace. News came out that the live-action movie would be produced by Steven Spielberg (my hero) and directed by Michael Bay (who produced awesome movies like Armageddon, Pearl Harbor and The Island) and would see changes applied in order to make it more realistic and believable. The new designs were obviously more alien, and had thousands of parts, quite unlike the boxy simplified forms of the G1. Prime had flames, Bumblebee was not a Volkswagen Beetle, Megatron looked like... err... a pile of junk... Cries of blasphemy and death threats were everywhere (yeah laugh all you want but it was dead serious back then) but as things slowly progressed and bits and pieces were unveiled, (most) fans started to accept these new designs. It was almost as if they were slowly letting us see the designs as to make us gradually warm up to them. The trailer followed much later, and after the long wait, all we got was a short clip of Mars Pathfinder landing on the red planet and getting destroyed by an unidentifiable robotic silhouette. The teaser trailer fared much better, showing clips of a couple of robots and transformations but it was severely chopped into pieces, as if to prevent us from seeing the actual Transformers (which turned out to be the whole idea eventually). The feature trailer, which appeared closer to the movie release date was the one that got everyone's attention (including most G1 fans). It sort of changed people's reactions and all of a sudden everyone wanted to watch Transformers. Suddenly it was cool to watch Transformers, like Transformers and buy Transformers. Transformers, all of a sudden, was THE most "IN" thing in the market. I admit this actually annoyed me in a way, as there was a time we Transformers fans were considered weird by the majority, and collecting figures or anything related was deemed weird. Heck, I even got some looks from people I know when they knew I subscribed to Dreamwave and IDW comics... But I guess it's all okay, as it means Transformers is getting a new lease of life and in the process, get many new fans that will keep the franchise alive. Okay, on to the review... bear in mind that I watched my 1st screening at the exclusive movie premiere with a whole theater of die-hard Transformers fans, so the experience "may" vary depending on which cinema you visit (but hey, you can always make it as happening as you want by screaming or cheering loudly during the movie... haha).
*SPOILERS AHEAD*
The Movie
The opening credits start with UiP, Paramount and Dreamworks logos appearing one-by-one, but soon you realize it's not as it seems. They all have been tweaked to emit metallic sounds as they beam onto the screen. To give you a slight taste of what's to come. Then the words "Before time began..." were uttered, by a familiar, fatherly voice. Yup, make no mistake, it's Peter Cullen, voice of Optimus Prime in the original G1 cartoon. He gives one of the most memorable intros I've seen in recent times (and the crowd goes wild!). He explains that Cybertron lies in ruins, and both the Autobots and Decepticons went searching all over the universe to find the Allspark, the mysterious magical holy cube that brought them life. And just as all hope seemed lost, they received news from a (to them) new unknown planet, called Earth... and that epic score plays and massive mechanical words transform in front of your eyes...
"TRANSFORMERS"
I dunno about you but I was starting to weep from that moment... It was one of the best openings for any movie like... ever! No messy titles, names, etc... just straight to the point! The story then moves to a SOCCENT base in Qatar, where a US chopper lands at the base. A robotic face could be seen through the pilot's face and the helicopter's rotors stop in an instant. Yeah, an instant. It was from that moment that you knew something was bound to happen... The rotor blades raise up slightly before folding-up, then the G1 transformation sound is heard (the crowd goes wild!) and the chopper transforms like nothing you've ever seen before... thousands of independently-moving pieces shifting into place, sliding and screeching until finally there was a figure standing upright in the darkness. It was Blackout, a Decepticon, the first Transformer to appear in the movie (the crowd goes ballistic). He fires rounds of EMP (Electro-magnetic-pulse) blasts and eliminates the entire US army single-handedly. The scene where his 3-fingered hand reaches towards the database, clamps onto it, pulls it towards himself and scans for files (complete with superb orchestral background) was an experience to behold, and will give you chills down your spine. It may finally occur to you by now that you're watching Transformers, yeah Transformers... in live-action... on the big screen... and they're real... as real as can be! Tons of explosions, flying tanks and gunfire is seen next, including a scene where a scorpion-shaped figure is released from his body. It's Scorponok, Blackout's loyal minion, who proceeds to dive into the sand. The whole scene will leave you breathless. And that's how action movies SHOULD start... with mind-blowing ACTION!
The main (non-Transformer) character in the movie is Sam (Spike) Witwicky (played by Shia LaBeouf), a young boy who tries to sell off his ancestor's belongings (turns out his great grandfather, Archibald Witwicky was an amazing explorer who found Megatron early in the 20th century) and has a crush on super-hot classmate Mikaela (played by the supercute & babelicious Megan Fox). He earns his first car from his dad (a really cheapskate Sparkplug) by earning $2000 and an A from class (after bargaining with the teacher with "what would Jesus do?"). The scene at the used-car lot with Bobby Bolivia (played marvelously by Bernie Mac) will get the whole cinema laughing even before he utters a word. There's also a lil tribute to G1 Bumblebee as there is a yellow Volkswagen Beetle sitting next to the movie Bumblebee (who is a yellow 1974 Chevrolet Camaro). Thanks to Bee's lil tricks, Sam chooses him as his first car... and this leads to fun after fun... Bumblebee's first unveiling brings such a sense of wonder rarely experience in the movies since perhaps Jurassic Park or maybe the recent Lord of the Rings trilogy... This movie is simply a joy to watch!
Lots of stories unveil later, there is Frenzy (not looking like his G1 counterpart at ALL, but cute) a funny fella who becomes a boom-box and Barricade, a Decepticon who uses deception literally, as he transforms into a Saleen Mustang police car. When the time comes for Barricade to fight Bumblebee, you get awesome full-blown transformations... close-ups of Bumblebee's feet shows all the advanced mechanical motors moving inside. This is like nothing you've seen in the movies... the technical splendor will leave you dazzled. Expect lots of heart-stopping car chases and tons of rolls and fights... Michael Bay leaves you hardly any room to rest, with non-stop action from scene-to-scene... (the whole cinema bursts into cheers at every transformation and fight)
Eventually Bumblebee earns Sam and Mikaela's trust, and takes them for a ride (after which Mikaela questions about his alt form of a "crap Camaro" and pisses him off) and also gets a new form soon after. He then brings them to a location to wait (oh, before I forget, Sam does this real slick move of getting Mikaela to sit on his lap, and she does! Oh God she's so hawt~). Wait for what? Well, wait for one of those most classic moments that will go down well in cinematic history... probably worth the admission price alone (It's the single BEST scene from the whole movie...)
Four asteroid-like objects enter Earth's orbit slowly, crash landing in various places... including a swimming pool and a stadium... (the whole sequence comes complete with more awesome orchestral music that will give you goosebumps). These objects turn out to be the Autobots, and they all scramble to search for their alt forms to transform to (eh... no Teletraan-1? Yeah, in the movie, Transformers can scan any object, as long as it can fit their mass). Ratchet picks a nearby green Hummer H2 rescue vehicle... Ironhide, who fell into a pool, scans a GMC Topkick nearby (kick-ass truck!!!) and Jazz, being the flashy showoff he is (darn he's so cool), picks a Pontiac Solstice from the Pontiac showroom... Optimus Prime scans a huge truck with flames... soon, the Autobots all sped to their meeting point where Bumblebee, Sam and Mikaela were... Then there was that awesome moment where out of the misty darkness a huge truck emerges, stops and transforms... with the most advanced, awesome, jaw-dropping transformation ever... all the inner-workings were visible and tons of shifting metal moving around.... tyres stop and break apart into four pieces each, windshield splits, head emerges, faceplate splits apart... nothing will prepare you for the sense of wonder in seeing Optimus Prime transforming for the first time on the big screen... (the crowd goes wild!) When the words "I am Optimus Prime..." were uttered by Peter Cullen, the cinema is filled with a roar unlike any I've ever heard before... Hands were clapping, tears were falling and cheers were aplenty... This was the moment the fans were waiting for... Optimus Prime was REAL~
Ironhide had a wicked sense of humor, and has the best lines in the movie like "Feeling lucky, PUNK?", "You have a rodent infestation... shall I TERMINATE?" and "The parents are very IRRITATING, can I take them out?" He just loves showing off his cannons... and when he actually uses them, boy are you in for a ride! Ratchet also has a gem of a line... "The boy's pheromone levels suggests he wishes to mate with the female"... lol... I really like Jazz, he's a lil like the G1 version, but his voice is really low and he didn't play any rock and roll music~ And oh, his 1st phrase in the movie was "What's cracking lil' bitches?"... haha... and finally, Ironhide and Ratchet get different alt modes and molds...
The movie was not all about robots (to die-hard fans' disappointment)... in order to create a sense of realism, they showed how the US military reacted, and they also revealed a top-secret group called "Sector Seven" which deals with these robotic alien beings... basically a bunch of cracks who try to throw their weight around, and ransacked the Witwicky household.. The Autobots also took a visit to the household earlier in search for Sam's great-grandfather's glasses, which hold the coordinates for the Allspark within it (etched out by Megatron's guidance system when he activated it by accident). There were several star performances by the human characters, and many, many hilarious scenes, especially the scene where the FBi infiltrates that annoying hacker's home (complete with over-the-top drama) and also a really memorable moment where the Autobots had to hide from Sam's parents... at one time, transforming into cars and trucks while parked on the lawn... thinking they were hiding! This movie has the laughs in the right places and all the seriousness in the right places too... The scene where Bumblebee gets captured and tortured by Sector Seven will make you hate those guys and cry for the poor fella...
There's another scene that would get many fans' attention... Prime states that when all fails, he would place the Allspark in his chest, fusing it with his spark, thus destroying them both. When he opened his chest, the crowd all screamed with cheers, hoping to see the Matrix of Leadership, but there was none to be seen. Only a slight shine to symbolise his spark, but the shape of it's holder DOES seem a lil like the Matrix. Maybe it's an easter egg~ hehe... he also says his trademark phrase, "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings", to much applause and that was also the phrase that was voted the most on the official site (the winning phrase would be uttered in the movie).
Sector Seven was later revealed to have Megatron in frozen custody. Megatron crash landed in the arctic after chasing the Allspark. Not realising that he was heating up fast from entering the atmosphere (due to greed and impatience), he landed right on the arctic ice and was soon swallowed into the freezing waters. The shock that followed sent him into stasis shock and left him frozen for thousands of years... only to be awakened in 1969 when a blunder while transporting him to his new location in Hoover Dam caused him to defrost. He was frozen back into stasis thanks to the sacrifices of a few good men. (How did I get this? Go read the Movie Prequel Comic and Novel for the full story!)
Frenzy was the one who located Megatron's whereabouts and alerts the other Decepticons, Starscream (an F22-Raptor! woohoo!!!), Bonecrusher (A Buffalo mine-clearing vehicle), Brawl (an Abrams tank... note that his name mistakenly appears as "Devastator" in the movie subtitles) and Barricade and Blackout... Note that they all speak in Cybertronian, hence the need for subtitles... The Decepticons display an awesome sense of loyalty towards their leader Megatron, especially with Blackout going "All Hail Megatron!". Another one of those amazing moments in this film...
Starscream arrives first and attacks Hoover Dam (not before showing awesome acrobatic skills and in-flight transformation) and Frenzy disables the generators, allowing Megs to thaw... "Megatron is melting!" Once Sector Seven learned that Bumblebee posed no threat, he was released (after lots of quarreling)... Bee proceeds to get the Allspark, which then transforms into a smaller cube (the only evidence of mass-shifting in the movie).
The scene in which Megatron reanimates is an awesome one. His face screams pure evil (complete with sinister glowing red eyes) and his scream "I AM MEGATRON!!!" will bring chills down your spine... (of course the cinema goes wild... and I screamed so loud!) Hugo Weaving (of Lord of the Rings, The Matrix and V for Vendetta fame...) did a good job of Megs, but I still wished it was Frank Welker. his voice was more distinctive and instantly recognized as Megs himself.
Anyways, the puny humans fire at him in vain and try to freeze him back, but he just smashes everything away effortlessly... (cinema screams and cheers everywhere) then transforming in a split-second with a heavy-clunking metallic transformation sound, and flying out of Hoover dam in a second with a loud, *FWOOOOOOOOOSSSHHHH!!!* that earned the most "WHOA"s in the cinema, complete with thunderous applause... Megatron RULEZ! He flies out, and gets greeted by his 2nd-in-command, Starscream (who proceeds to say "I live to serve you Lord Megatron"... haha as IF!)... Megs' phrase "You disappoint me again, Starscream" (after learning that the humans have escaped with the Allspark) earned loads of cheers, it was just like the cartoon... too bad that's the only time they do that... (Btw, Starscream was voiced by Charles Adler, the same dude who voiced Cow, Chicken, Cousin Boneless, the Red Guy and I. R. Baboon in the cartoon Cow and Chicken). LoL!
Cut to another scene, Sam and Mikaela inside Bumblebee in a convoy with Sector Seven head to the city and along the way meet up with Prime, Ratchet, Jazz and Ironhide, who all proceed to do E-turns to join the convoy... amazing stuff, well executed...
It'll be too much to list out all the awesome scenes of the movie (if you've read this far and still haven't realised it's a BIG-TIME spoiler, it's really your fault...) but the short battle between Optimus Prime and Bonecrusher was one of the most breathtaking... Nevermind that Bonecrusher's transformation alone was superb, from how his components break apart, wheels are dropped, followed by large arms grabbing those wheels and forming the legs (which are on skates, mind you) and his head appears... Prime takes out his energon axe (sword or whatever... it's a tribute to the cartoon) and shoves it up Bonecrusher with much violence, shattering his head to smithereens... (of course I'm not too happy with the result... Bonecrusher was one of my favs in the movie and that happened too fast) Bonecrusher had only one line, "I HATEEE YOUUUU~!!!" right before Prime executes him...
But anyways, the amount of action, destruction and mayhem that follows as Bumblebee, Brawl, Blackout, Jazz, Ironhide, Ratchet, Starscream, Megatron and Optimus Prime battle it out in the city... It would make you numb due to the excessive action-packed sequences (a repeat watch should help you a bit, the more the better...). I've watched it 3 times (at the time this was written) and I caught something new with EVERY viewing! Brawl single-handedly took on a number or Autobots and the army... and took quite a beating, continuing to fight even after losing an arm... Starscream was a tough one too, hitting 2 Autobots on ground with relative ease in one scene... and before that, flew with a squadron of Raptors, then transforming, destroying a few, transforming back to join formation, then transforming to robot again to wreck more havoc... again and again... all in a single scene! Blackout sends shivers wherever he goes, especially on one scene where he lands on a building and Sergent Lennox (Josh Duhamel) says "We're so DEAD". (by now the cinema was roaring with cheers and excitement)
Ironhide does this super-kick-ass move in which he transforms while on the move (with wicked slow-motion G1 transformation sound), punches the ground to launch himself in the air, dodging 2 of Brawl's missiles, then firing his twin cannons (one blue, one reddish-orange) to the ground, propelling him into the air... landing right in front of a girl (who proceeds to scream) and does a cartwheel... all this, in SLOW-MOTION... (and the crowd goes wild!)
Jazz fearlessly takes on Brawl head-on, calling him a "Decepticon Punk". Military attacks, Autobots fight, Decepticons attack... Oh, and Megs shows his brutal side by grabbing Jazz, flinging him in the air, transforming, stepping on him, then grabbing him with both of his hands. Jazz goes, "You want a piece of me? You want a piece of me?"... Megs replies, "NO, I want TWO!" and rips him into two... Poor Jazz...
A lil later, Megs and Prime duke it out... it's a Transformers fan's dream come true with all the action and explosions... you just don't want it to end! (My goodness the cinema was so noisy with cheers, tears and screams) Prime and Meg's final battle was totally awesome, although it's arguable that not enough was shown. Megs was portrayed to be stronger than Prime when they should actually be equals... But you have to admit, his cannon was totally awesome (a combination of both his hands, instead of permanently attached to his arm like in G1) and one hit sent Prime flying onto a building. Megs seemed totally insane... almost like a psychopath, unlike his calm self in the cartoon. He screamed pure evil, and would stop at nothing to get the Allspark. Prime even say a line from the previous Transformers cartoon, "One Shall Stand, One Shall Fall"... and there were so many cheers. That one sure made G1 fans happy...
Anyways, their fight was too short, and it ended in a climax where both him and Prime were downed after a fall from a building. Prime sliced off one of his legs and just as he was reaching the Allspark within Sam's grasp, Prime tells Sam to shove it up his chest (he does seem suicidal at times). Sam instead shoves it up Megatron's ass... err... I mean chest... therefore making it fuse with his chest and sending him into a Transformer's equivalent of a heart attack... Poor Megs falls instantly...
Prime then goes "Sam... I owe you my life... we are in your debt"... what nonsense!!! The great Optimus Prime needing a lil boy to save him? But my biggest guess was it was meant to be a blow to Megatron, who viewed humans as bugs (he even flicked one, saying "disgusting"... much to the audience's laughter) and the irony of being brought down by one. And it also gave Sam the confidence and self-esteem he needed. Anyways, a satisfying end to a wonderful battle... although it was sad seeing Ironhide carrying Jazz's body to Prime...
The ending leaves a number of points which could be used in the sequel. Optimus Prime was seen taking a shard of the Allspark from Megatron's chest (maybe they can work something out? or maybe restore Jazz?)... Scorponok was still alive somewhere (he only lost a tail... and he CAN regenerate, right?)... Barricade was M.I.A (well, he was supposed to have been killed by Prime along with Bonecrusher, but the scene was somehow cut out)... and after the credits, Starscream was seen flying off to space (presumingly looking for backup?).
So most likely it won't end here, especially after Michael Bay expressed interest in making about 4 sequels... and rumors of the 2nd part being green lit... The way things are going for the first movie, I say...
BRING IT ON!!!
When the movie ended, for every viewing I watched, the crowd stood up and gave a round of applause... a standing ovation. This made me proud as we Malaysians are finally mature enough to acknowledge that a movie is good by clapping. Well done indeed... This is what an entertaining movie should be like, it's groundbreaking, it has very high repeat-viewing value and tons of feel good factor.
Conclusion
This movie earns a 5-out-of-5-star rating, but if there were more stars it would have earned more, possibly up to 10. The cons do nothing to change the fact that this movie has MAXIMUM entertainment value. If you haven't watch this, you jolly well should because if you aren't, you're just a stubborn donkey who's too afraid or reluctant to admit that this is the BEST movie this year. Michael Bay was right, this ain't no toy movie... Yes, it's by far the MOVIE OF THE YEAR.
Pros: It's Transformers for crying out loud!, Peter Cullen, mind-blowing action, lotsa humor, kick-ass Megatron, many instant classic scenes (make that practically every scene was a moment to remember), almost every line can be made into a quote, ultra-realism, nods to G1 in many ways and that awesome kick-ass score (something in between Lord of the Rings and Star Wars)...
Cons: Megatron not voiced by Frank Welker and looking a bit like an Evangelion, Prime has a weird mouth (should've kept the mouthpiece on at all times like the cartoon), some scenes too blurry or messy (because of designs being too complex, can be solved by repeated viewing), Prime and Megs battle too short, storyline not that deep (but I don't mind it at all!), Brawl labeled as "Devastator", some G1 stuff should have been in or portrayed differently, Decepticons too fragile and Jazz dies too easily, Megs also dies too easily and appears for the last 30mins only...
"Whaddya lookin' at, Punk?"
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